Decisions, Decisions

So I went to the LOWT auditions a few months ago and Imagination Stage in Bethesda called me back for several of their shows in their 2010/2011 season. I of course went and showed my stuff...I didn't get any things but hey, it was great fucking experience. Although, my last callback didn't go so well, considering I'm not a belter...I'm a 1st Soprano, with opera training! So here I am, little 'ole me, waiting to go in and I get to listen to all the other ladies before me. They are amaze balls!!! I go in...do my half-ass belt/holy-shit I'm so scared I quiver. Needless to say I won't be getting that show either.

Anyway, all of this is beside the point but hey I like tangents. Well last night I received an email from them again asking me to audition for their summer musical in 2011. This is the summer that I plan to study in London...well that's my plan right now. Audition for RADA and LAMDA and apply to their short courses. I COULD audition, but I don't have enough confidence in my singing abilities (for the record I can sing, I just suffer from nerves when it comes to singing in auditions). Any advice? LOL. So I thought to myself: "Jennifer, if you go to this audition and you sound like shit, they are gonna realize that you suck and they'll stop calling you back." I'm pretty sure I'm gonna pick London, because I really want to further my training over one show for Children's Theatre. I figure London will be better in the long haul anyways. I'm just afraid that I am going to make the wrong decision and I'll live with the regret. But then again, that's just how I roll...

I've got other insecurities running through my head as well: Boys...Job...Money. And why in the mother-fucking world did I decide that it would be good to get involved with a 38 yr-old Marine? I don't quite know how to end things, considering the sex is amazing although I know he sees more than one woman. He had no concept of what monogamy means. HA. I think it will be much easier once I find a non-douchebag. They are out there, so I think if I don't look, maybe I'll get lucky. Damn me for being a hopeless romantic. I do find myself becoming more cynical and cold hearted. But that's for another story...

PS: When the fuck did it become summer in DC? This spoken from a Floridian...

And So It Begins!

So here I am....writing a blog. I never thought in a million fucking years I would be doing something like this. After much thought I decided that it would be a good idea to get my musings out in public...no matter how random they are. I won't apologize for what I write; what comes out of my mouth will be honest and interesting (hopefully)! Anyway, enjoy and I hope to pop out stuff relatively in good time.